Age Changes, Tryouts and Team Switches

This week on the Sideline Spill we are diving into one of the biggest conversations happening in youth soccer right now - the US Soccer age change, tryouts, team switches, and the emotional rollercoaster our families are navigating. But this episode isn't just us parents talking, this time we interviewed some of the soccer players too. 

From fears about leaving teammates behind to pressure during tryouts and how they really feel about the changes, their answers were honest, funny and surprisingly insightful. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

I appreciate what Roman said because I feel like he's saying what most people want to say about stage change.

SPEAKER_03 0:18

Welcome back to the Sideline Spill.

SPEAKER_01 0:20

This is Monica and Sabrina and Heidi.

SPEAKER_03 0:24

And today we're gonna talk about something that feels a little bit like a taboo topic lately, and that's the age change and the tryouts that are going on right now.

SPEAKER_02 0:35

So in the last year, we have found out about the soccer age change.

SPEAKER_03 0:41

So U.S. Soccer made a decision to change the age groupings for the teams going forward. So right now, our boys who are playing in U13, they are grouped by birth year. So 2013 is their birth year, and any kid who was born in 2013 and tried out and made that team are grouped together. But with the age change, what will happen is that any kids who were born between August 1st through July 31st of the next year will be grouped as one. My understanding is that it's in part to align kids with their grades, which you know doesn't really work for us in this area when the schools cut off as September 1st, but um and also developmentally there's supposed to be some benefits. What else have you guys heard about it? That it sucks.

SPEAKER_01 1:46

No, I think that from what I've heard is that this happened before. And so, in my opinion, you know, I think someone told me it was about eight or nine years ago, maybe somewhere in there, that they had it this way before, then they went to birth year, then they went back to it. To me, it just feels like a lot of flip-flopping and whiplash for a lot of families and boys and girls that are playing soccer. And I don't know how many times you need to do something and change it back to something else, but I think it's kind of ridiculous.

SPEAKER_03 2:19

I can kind of understand the logic of trying to group kids by their school year, but I just think it's never gonna be a perfect solution for anyone because there's always gonna be outliers, right? I mean, in our area, the school cut off September 1st, so you know you're gonna have kids like my son who was born in late August who are actually going to be separated from their grade year.

SPEAKER_08 2:47

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 2:48

And it's different for my son, because we held him a year. So he it would align, but all of his friends are actually older. Yeah. So it I don't know, it doesn't make too much sense either way that you look at it.

SPEAKER_03 3:03

So how do you guys feel about the age change? I mean, we know what it is, but how does it make you guys feel thinking about it?

SPEAKER_02 3:11

I think for me it's more so of how it makes my son feel. Yeah, it sucks for me because I will be losing our friend time, possibly. I don't know yet. Um, you know, after tryouts, we don't know exactly what's going to happen, but it's more so for Roman, you know, he's frustrated and conf and confused about it, and he is like trying to be as positive, I think, as he can, but he just really wants the team to stay the same. And I think they've been together for so long now, I just feel like it's unfair for them to make this change after so many years of them all being together.

SPEAKER_01 3:56

I could agree with that a hundred percent. Um, I think for incoming soccer players, it doesn't matter. They're trying out for the first time, they don't have a team built, but then you have someone like our boys' teams that they've been together for three years, they've built something, the parents have built something, it's a community in itself. We've been kind of bragging about it on the podcast a little bit about how much we love our our team and our community. And I truly believe this, not just for our team, but for you know, our team and up, it causes a lot of chaos, no pun intended. Um, it it's chaotic for all the kids, and then maybe they potentially don't get to stay on the team that they wanted to stay on because they do have to drop age peer. And chances are, you know, the boys or the girls could potentially feel not chosen.

SPEAKER_02 4:54

Right.

SPEAKER_01 4:55

And what kid doesn't want to feel chosen, but ultimately it doesn't I feel like that is something that's probably gonna happen, uh, either which way, you know, whether it's not being chosen by the same team or the team that you wanted to or a different team or whatever. And so I just feel like in the grand scheme of things, this is just very messy, it feels icky, it feels there's so much unknown with it. And I know that once it's said and done, it's said and done, and we can move on and get to a new norm, but change is hard. And so my my feelings are that if people are just coming into soccer, it's not gonna be a huge deal. But for the teams that have been together for a long time, it's gonna it could be a huge, huge change. So it just doesn't feel like great as a parent looking in on it, and I don't want CJ to also feel a certain way.

SPEAKER_03 5:53

Yeah, it really seems like the path of least resistance would have been to apply it for certain age groups forward, right? But I also know not every club starts like you know, at U 10, for example, like our club does. Yeah, right. Some clubs start at U8, you know, or younger. So I don't know, I don't know if there's a perfect answer, but it's obviously impactful. And it kind of feels like I understand the logic behind getting people aligned with their grades, but you know, what difference does it make to having a birth year, right? As long as it's a consistent, you're playing against like 2013 against 2013 versus you know, August of 2013 through whatever, right? Why should it why should it make a difference as long as you're comparing the same age groups against the same age groups?

SPEAKER_01 6:59

And I've heard from quite a few people that have experience, and most times I've heard that they recommend that be having children at age peer is what I'm trying to say. Um and I know that there are some what does H peer mean though, really? Yeah, and I'm just going off of what US soccer is saying right now, uh-huh of age peer and staying. I guess I would say talking to a trainer, he had said going down, which we don't want to say that. Everyone keeps saying H-peer. So typically it's basically bumping down, but it's considered age peer. It's not like you're bumping down a level, it's just going age peer for what they're saying.

SPEAKER_03 7:49

So if if there's a kid like Xander and CJ, actually in Roman too, right? Who's going to be affected by the age change and the team that they're playing on right now is essentially going to require them to play up. Playing age peer would be playing in the correct age group which for their birthday. Technically, yes.

SPEAKER_01 8:11

And I know that that sounds like a lot of people are like, don't say that, it's not playing down, it's age pure. But it is, yeah. So I've heard from several people that say it's it's it's good to be age peer. It actually gives them an extra year of soccer, too. They don't age out. Right. Um, but who knows if things change again. Right. It just feels messy.

SPEAKER_03 8:37

Yeah, yeah. What do you think, Heidi? You're kind of quiet over there.

SPEAKER_02 8:42

I know. I've been I'm just trying to wrap my head around it all. Um I think the other thing that has been a struggle for me is how political it all has felt. Um, more than it being like developmental for our kids, it's become like who likes who the best. And and you know, instead of like effort and growth, it's it, you know, sometimes turns into favoritism and who like you know, like coaches have their favorites, and that happens sometimes, right? Like, but and then also with like these new coaches coming in, they already have you know a team, a team.

SPEAKER_03 9:28

So how do they like entangle? Yeah, but really like we also already have a team, like everyone's kind of in the same boat. Yeah, it feels different because like in our case, there's now gonna be a third team in our age group, potentially, right?

SPEAKER_01 9:47

Um there's enough boys for it doesn't mean that that's true.

SPEAKER_03 9:51

I guess I guess I'm kind of assuming, and I don't know that for sure yet, but we'll see. Yeah, I I complicates things.

SPEAKER_01 10:00

It definitely does, and and you know, having teams like you said, Heidi, that are I know ours is built too, because we've but you know, different teams coming in and they already have like who they want on their team. But if you look at what let's say other clubs do, maybe in Sacramento, they probably all try out in a pool and they list them from top to bottom, and you know, X amount go on the first team, X amount go on the second, whatever, working down the list. That's probably how it usually is. I can't say that that is for sure every time.

SPEAKER_03 10:36

Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I would think they'd have to take into account positions and whatnot, too, right? Like you can't have if all your top players are forwards, right? You're gonna have to take that into account. And I don't know. I honestly I'd be curious to know how people instead of the case.

SPEAKER_01 10:52

I was just gonna say I'm not a coach though. I'm saying that that's okay. So I was a cheerleader for 10 years, okay? And when you tried out, you were listed from who had the scored the highest points to who had the bottom. Right. And if there was a very big gap, let's say a 15-point gap, those people did not make the squad. Yeah. So I'm going off of what I can remember as a cheerleader. I'm not saying that that's how soccer is because I'm not a soccer coach. I don't know how they rate players. Yeah. I don't know if it's a point system, I don't know if it's like, oh, these are all great forwards, these are all great mid. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 11:26

Right.

SPEAKER_01 11:27

So it's just me going on a whim of like, who knows? But this is how cheer was, you know.

SPEAKER_03 11:31

Well, I feel like Coach Athena said that they do rank them when they make their rosters. Okay. Right. So um I don't know exactly how that works, but I also don't know how like big clubs do it. That'd be really interesting. I don't know if there's anyone listening who's yeah, in a big club, that would be um just cool background information. How do you try out?

SPEAKER_01 11:52

I've heard rumors that tryouts in certain areas are you drop your kid off in the front, they go inside and no one gets to watch. Yeah, your kid holds it.

SPEAKER_03 12:02

I think that would be wise.

SPEAKER_01 12:03

Might be perfectly. Yeah, and then they just let you know later. Yeah. You know, so I don't know. I would yeah, if you are listening and you're a part of a big club, let us know how you guys do tryouts. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 12:17

So just talking developmentally, though, one thing that I did think was kind of interesting, both talking to Xander's trainer and Josh, um, my husband, was just thinking about it from the developmental standpoint. Like regardless of the reasons for the age change, whether or not they make sense, it is, you know, I think important to take into account where your child is developmentally. And, you know, at first I was like, ugh, I really hate the idea of, you know, my son dropping to H-pure, I guess, as we would call it. But it's also been explained to me that for them developmentally, what's best is if they get the most playing time they can. And if they can't get playing time on the team that they're on, then it may be better for them to move to a different team. Whether that's within the, you know, what one of the other teams that are within our age grouping or in a younger team, that could have some benefits for them long run.

SPEAKER_02 13:24

Yeah. Yeah. He talked to me about that the other day, and that was a great way to look at it, and I think that would be really helpful for other boys to hear that perspective.

SPEAKER_03 13:35

Yeah, he talked to me about how, like, so for example, Xander is like right on the cusp of the H cutoff, right? So his birthday is August 26th. Um, and that would mean that if he went age peer, he would be the oldest on the team, right? Which means he's probably a little bigger, a little stronger, a little more developed physically than the other kids. Versus if he stays in, you know, his current team, right, which is moving to the what is it, 12, 13? Yeah. 2012, 2013 mix, then he's gonna be the youngest, and they're gonna play kids who are whole six months older than they're playing right now, which means they're just gonna be bigger and stronger and more physically developed than right now. Right. Versus he's in the middle right now, right? So I yeah, it's hard to argue that. I understand that.

SPEAKER_01 14:32

Well, and you have to also think, too, he has a whole year on the boys that he would be H peer with, too. So not just that he'd be the oldest. He also has done competitive for a whole year before those boys have. So he does have the skill a little bit, and yeah, and and he has already been full field along with CJ and Roman and whoever else it has to go, but possibly will have to go H-peer. So they have a whole year as well, right? Which is also a good perspective to have. They'll be a little more conditioned.

SPEAKER_02 15:07

They have seen what six months or a year difference can look like when we've played up, and it's hard, it's hard for our boys sometimes to keep up. So I I think that was a really good perspective that Josh brought up. And um, like I said, I really think some of the boys, if they haven't already, would benefit to hearing that.

SPEAKER_01 15:29

Yeah. From your guys' perspective, do you feel like the adults are a little bit more attached to the team compared to your boys? Or do you feel like they're more attached, or even just during this process, what have you recognized in that aspect?

SPEAKER_02 15:47

Um, that's a really good question. Um, I being transparent, I probably feel like I am more attached to the team than Roman is. Not that he doesn't love his team, but I think that he just wants to play soccer, whatever that looks like, right? Because of the friendships he's made with these boys already and the time that he's spent with them, it's not like they're gonna go anywhere. So I I don't really worry about those friends, I don't think he worries about those friendships as much as I do, is that's what I'm trying to say. So yeah.

SPEAKER_03 16:27

That's a tough one. Um, because when I talk to Xander about different possibilities, because you know, in his mind, obviously his preference would be to stay with his current team, right? That's gonna be all of their preference, I would think. But I'm also trying to talk to him about the possibilities that he could end up on a different team and what that could look like. And, you know, his responses are that he wants to be on the team where his friends are, right? So it's less about the team, it's more about the individuals that he cares about, people like CJ, Roman, Patty, Maverick, all those boys, really all of those boys on that red team. I think that he would easily be able to overcome a team change. It would be hard, yeah, right. And I think in some ways it would be harder for me as a parent than it would be for him, really. I think it'll be hard for him at first, and then in the long run, as long as he's got a couple of friends that he can, you know, relate to and then he'll make more friends, I think he'll be fine, right? I just think I agree. I just think I'm attached and I don't like the idea because we have like a whole soccer family, and I think our boys are way more resilient than we give them credit for.

SPEAKER_02 17:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 17:52

I think that's very true. Yeah, yeah, I have to agree. But I both and I would say also it's not all about the social aspect, at least not for Xander anyway, right? Because I have talked to him about you know, other options, like for example, like hey, let's say you didn't make that team. Would you rather play on a different comp team or would you rather go back to rec? And he's like, absolutely not. He does not want to go back to rec because he knows that he wants to play on the most competitive team that will have him, right? Right. And um, you know, there's a lot of factors that go into that, and I think obviously we'll help guide them through that, like as far as like coaches and other things, right, that'll come into the picture.

SPEAKER_01 18:33

But um I think that's the hardest part about it all is I've said this a couple times that I wanted to give CJ the reins and let him make a choice for himself because I do believe that he could make a great choice, and the more I talk with him, it I don't know if I'll have to step in or not. And it's been really difficult because yeah, I'm super attached to the team and to the moms and the dads and what would the community we have, you know. And so is he, he's all about his friends, but not just that, like you said, the social aspect, but also, you know, there's some days where he's like coming to me, he's like, Hey, look at this, and he's showing me something new with soccer, and he's like, Luke taught me that, or um, hey, look what Patrick taught me. Patty is what we call him, but um, look what Patty taught me, and he's sitting there like juggles like 50 times, you know, and it's like he taught me the right way, blah, blah, blah. And like, you know, so and so did this, and it's like, not only does he care about the boys and his friendships, but they're also teaching him. And he is gaining a lot, whether it's at our house for a sleepover or a side thing at practice, like he's always learning something new from one of the boys, and I think that's special, you know, to have those boys teaching him something that he may have not known the day before.

SPEAKER_03 19:58

Yeah. So all of it. I feel like it's a challenge because you want the kids to be surrounded by exceptional players, right? You want them to play with a high-level team because you can grow when you're surrounded by great players, right? But also there is a little bit of a balance in in finding maybe the right team, right? And that's gonna be best for them developmentally, right? So that's what, yeah, no, that's what I think Josh was trying to say, right? When he's explaining that to me. But, you know, I don't know. I don't know. Now I feel like I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_01 20:36

And that's that's what CJ said too. He's like, you know, I I would like to stay with the same team um because I want to challenge myself. That's exactly what he said. And that didn't come from me or his dad. So obviously it things are running through his mind. Right. And I love that. Like I want him to be challenged too, but also I do want what's truly the best for him and what's gonna help him excel, and so forth. Yeah. So just piggybacking off of that, I think that this might be different for you compared to your boys, but is the development, the friendships, confidence, or the winning most important for your child's experience for soccer? I know we kind of touched on this a little bit in everything that we've said, but what is most important to you guys and what do you think is most important to the boys? Oh gosh.

SPEAKER_02 21:30

That's hard. I know. That's the million dollar question. How about all of it? A little bit the boys and their age right now. What do they want? They want to win.

SPEAKER_01 21:40

Win.

SPEAKER_02 21:41

So I think for them, winning winning and friendships is kind of like right there.

SPEAKER_01 21:47

And then after CJ said the whole like challenge, he wants to be challenged. I'm like, he obviously is thinking of development in his own way. Right.

SPEAKER_03 21:57

I would say Xander's similar in that way. I I think um you know, we had an unusual season this last season where we did not win as much as they're used to. And I think he ha handled that fine. I don't think he felt like we have to win every game for him to feel fulfilled on that team necessarily, right? But but I do think that if he was on a team that, you know, w was consistently playing at that level, that could be hard, right? So I don't know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 22:31

I I do think about the confidence aspect of that because I I you know talked to you guys before and you know, Coach Athena and stuff, just about going from having a confident boy to a young man that was kind of not so much, and then it's like this ebb and flow thing of like losing confidence and gaining it, and that's something I truly want him to get back, which I feel like everyone always tells me they're like, he's such a confident, you know, he's so small, but he's like walking 10 feet tall, and he's so confident in this and that, but and I don't know, maybe it's part of growing up and maturity, and maybe they kind of change in that aspect, and they're not it's not so much fun and rec and scoring whatever, you know, and it does change, so I don't know, but that is a a hope of mine for him.

SPEAKER_03 23:20

I kind of feel like you listed four things, right? Confidence, friendship, what was it? Development and winning. And like for us as parents, probably confidence and development would be the top, and probably for him as a player, it'd be winning and friendships. Yeah, right. Yeah you know, so exactly um that's where I think we have to help guide them a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 23:43

I know, and it's hard because I told myself when this time came, I would be like, nope, I'm gonna let CJ make the choice. And now the more I talk about it, the more I think about it, the more I watch, because we got to watch tryouts all four days. And I'm like, who I have to let him choose. But I want a guide, but I also want him to feel confident in himself because I told him tonight, I said, I want you happy, I want you truly happy to your core. And if that means this team and you say that, then yes, I I support you. But also some of the unknowns, we don't know what a new team would feel like or how they would mesh together, and it could be great. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, look at all of us first coming together. We didn't talk at all during our first parent meeting. Yeah, and now we're three years later, and I mean, us three, we've got a podcast, but we do Thanksgiving with the whole team. Yeah, all the parents, the families, the siblings, the last three years. You know, there's so much that we've built. But at what point is it just about soccer and like the way the process is supposed to go?

SPEAKER_03 24:58

Yeah, I don't know. Let's be real. Like, unfortunately, when it comes down to it, from the club perspective and the comp perspective, yeah, it has to come down to the soccer.

SPEAKER_01 25:11

Oh, 100%. I think it was rhetorical. I think I was being rhetorical. Yeah. Like in the sense of like me just tapping into myself saying like it's about soccer.

SPEAKER_03 25:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:22

Like we will have friendships outside of this. We can do things, we can have friends givings, you know?

SPEAKER_03 25:29

And we better, because if these kids aren't on the same team, we're not going to the Thanksgiving, and I'm not gonna be happy about that.

SPEAKER_02 25:36

We either what did we talk about other in our last podcast about being intentional with our time? It's just something we are gonna have to be intentional with.

SPEAKER_01 25:45

But we will. I I don't have any doubt in my mind. It's just the worries, the changes, the things that we all think about in general.

SPEAKER_02 25:53

Change is hard for everybody, and especially our boys, I think. But again, I shouldn't say that because I just said how resilient they are.

SPEAKER_03 26:04

So I think change is harder for us personally. I do think that they're more resilient than maybe we give them credit for sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 26:14

And one of our podcasts, we were talking about not fixing, and I've been reminding myself that all week. I don't know about you girls, but I was just thinking in my head on the way here, and I was like, well, maybe if I know he's gonna be cut, maybe I'll tell him to choose a different team so he doesn't feel like he's not being chosen and that he's not being cut. But then the other side of my brain is like, no, let it let it happen. This is life, okay? I was cut my first year trying out for cheerleading, and I was an alternate, the first alternate. So if someone got hurt, I got to cheer. And it didn't happen. And I was sad, but I can't tell you how long I was sad for because I mean I just want about my life, you know. I was sixth grade. Right. Uh the the boy's age, actually. Yeah, and so like half of my brain is like, mom, buffer this and and stop it for him and just tell him to choose a different team because you know he's gonna get cut, which I I don't. I'm just saying that out loud. Like if I know, I'll tell him to just choose something else. And then I'm like, on the other side, no, just let it happen. Like it's gotta happen the way it's supposed to happen. Yeah. So I I've just been reminding myself all week to not try to stop it, buffer it, fix it, all the things. I don't know. Is that going through your your guys' head? Or is it just me?

SPEAKER_02 27:43

Um, I think that always goes through my head for multiple real reasons, not just for tryouts, but I mean, look at this week Roman decided to hurt himself again. You know, here we are, and he had to miss some of tryouts, and you know, as much as we know or I know that he is a good player. There's other good players, there's always gonna be somebody better than you. And you know, as confident as I am in him, there's still always that worry and what's going to happen. Yeah, what change is gonna happen, what you know. I I don't know. I think for me, I just let it happen and then be there for them when they need us to be. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 28:31

I didn't really think about trying to like fix it necessarily. I mean, it is gonna be what it's gonna be, and we've had a lot of conversations about you know just consistency and you know, just effort and stuff like that, and you know, this is how it goes sometimes. I mean, he's been cut before in the past, you know, um or placed on B teams, you know, for school and whatnot. And you know, I remember last fall he made the silver team. No, I'm sorry. Yeah, the silver team. There's a silver and a royal team. The silver team is like the B team for the school team. And the royal is like the A team. I hate to call it that, but that's what it is. Let's just be real. They put more of the younger kids on the silver team. They usually have a couple of older kids, so Xander's in seventh grade, right? So um, you know, he could really go either way. And he didn't make the royal team, several of his friends did. Um, he ended up playing on the silver team, and then he continued to practice and play through the season, and the coach came up to us and said, Hey, like if he had played like this during triouts, he'd be on the royal team. I'm like, Well, that's great to hear, but also like you know, that's his that's a consequence of not showing up when you need to, right? So they have to learn that sometimes, right? Even though I do think like sometimes they just go through phases or growth, spurts and whatnot that can have impacts that are difficult for them to just for sure like push through, right? Like, but you know, I don't think, like, for example, right now, like whether or not he makes the red team, which is like our A team, I don't think he's got a lack of effort. He's always trying. He shows up all of the time, he does extra training outside of practice, he plays at school, like he's touching the ball a lot.

SPEAKER_08 30:35

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 30:36

It's just is where he is right now developmentally. So yeah, I was gonna say, I feel like a lot of the boys are developing at different rates. Yeah, I just think that's what it is. And like my son said, what did CJ say? He said something about puberty. Mom, puberty is just hard, and we're all dealing with it. So, how much longer is this gonna be? I'm like, you know, I'm not quite sure. Yeah, but he's really proud of that mustache that he has.

SPEAKER_03 31:05

Yeah, I've seen that mustache.

SPEAKER_01 31:08

But I think, I think more or less I said what I said just now because I come from a long line of trying to control things and prevent things from happening, and that's what we're actively working on. We've talked about this in a few episodes of not trying to control it, let it be, and it's just what's going on in my mind. Not that I was going to do that by all means, but my brain is just all over the place. Of course, you don't want your kid to be hurt or exactly somewhere different than his friends that he's built relationships with.

SPEAKER_03 31:39

Yeah. I think that's the hard part is just knowing that your kid's gonna be hurt.

SPEAKER_01 31:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 31:44

Even though I think they are resilient and they will move on and be totally fine. He's gonna be devastated. Oh, yeah. He's gonna be just absolutely devastated at first.

SPEAKER_01 31:53

And I will write with him, you know, if that happens. Like I my heart can't handle it, but also we'll get through it. It's gonna be fine. It will be okay. And I've I felt really good and like unsure at the same time. It's weird.

SPEAKER_03 32:08

I don't know about you. Like, and I'm I'm sorry, I'm not like talking, not talking to you, Heidi. I just feel like Roman's in a different place developmentally than Xander and CJ. Yeah, where Roman's probably not gonna have much of a concern, right? But Xander and CJ are a little bit more similar developmentally, I feel like. And I just think it's been a roller coaster of emotions for me personally. Yeah, like I go from being like really frustrated and to being like sad to being like, oh, whatever. It'll be what it'll be. And then I'm like, this is just ridiculous. I'm actually doing great right now.

SPEAKER_01 32:49

It was more like two weeks ago that I was not in a great place about it. When things are sprung on you and it feels like out of left field, it takes a different route. Like your brain goes crazy, your body, you know, it's it's a lot of craziness. And I think this time I was just kind of like, it is what it is, and it's gonna be okay. And I'm kind of low-key happy that you were a little bit more freaked because I could be there for you and not think about how actually freaked I am on the inside, too. Yeah. So thank you for that.

SPEAKER_03 33:17

Sorry for being freaked out, but thank you. No, but talking it through with me in all reality.

SPEAKER_01 33:21

It you know, it's just it's bittersweet. Yes, that's what it is. And I don't like it. I know any of it. I'm with you too. I I don't. I it's a lot, and there's a lot of pressure on the coaches, there's a lot of pressure on the parents, and there's a lot of pressure on the boys. And no offense to our club. We do like the club, the club is great, there's a lot of changes going on within the club, but also the club was not very like this. Is what you have to do, coaches, and do that. It has been a very big it's up to you, then it's up to the parents, and then it's up to the player, and it just feels so messy. Yeah, there was not a definitive, like, here is exactly what you do.

SPEAKER_02 34:03

I mean, let's be real. The club has never been the best at being organized.

SPEAKER_03 34:13

Okay, fair point. It's fair.

SPEAKER_02 34:16

So honestly, I'm not surprised. I mean, there's a lot of pieces that go into it, and I'm not gonna sit here and pretend like I even know how any of it works. But even starting with Rec, it was never organized, and it's just another piece of it that we have to deal with, and our boys have to deal with, and then again, there's the political side of it and just all the yucky stuff in between, and it's just like I just want my son to play soccer, I just want him to go out there and have fun. Like, I don't I don't like that there's all this in-between stuff. Like, I understand people have to try out, there's this and that, but I just feel like right now it just feels as Sabrina has said many times, yucky, yeah, and and maybe even a little bit of non-transparency through a lot of it, and a lot of it.

SPEAKER_03 35:09

And it's gonna be fine, and then lo and behold, it's actually not gonna be fine. It's gonna be a huge issue, and like don't downplay it, just say it what it is, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 35:20

Yeah, and and I think it's hard, just as trying to be transparent myself, I think it's hard to have transparency when the people above you are not having transparency and the people above them are not having you know what I mean, yeah. And US soccer kind of left it as each club can kind of do what they want a little bit, but they're recommending this, so it's like if there was a definitive line that couldn't be crossed at the very top level where the changes were made, yeah, there would be nothing to question right now.

SPEAKER_03 35:52

Yeah, I feel like US soccer was really wishy-washy.

SPEAKER_01 35:55

Oh, so yeah, and that doesn't help. I'm not blaming the coaches, I'm not blaming the board, I'm not blaming anything really, except sorry to say it, but US soccer come out with just like, hey, this is what it has to be, and then there will be no questions asked.

SPEAKER_03 36:11

Yeah, I mean, there's more guidance out there now, and I mean, I honestly don't know what conversations are being had within the club as far as like with the coaches. It just it's a big change, and you almost need to like kind of overcommunicate that sort of stuff, right? They're gonna end up with a lot of unhappy parents.

SPEAKER_02 36:29

Again, it's like they almost waited till the last minute to try to figure it all out. Like, I feel like we've been talking about it for so long, but then like at the last minute, now it's just like happening, and there's no communication in the disorganization of it all. I don't know. I just feel like it could have been it could have been done in a better manner.

SPEAKER_01 36:52

Almost like a little guideline of what to do, how to do it. And then we can go here, and it sounds like it's just gonna have to be messy and chaotic before it can like align again. And I hope that there's alignment. I hope that there is organization, and I hope that the coaches and the board and everyone can work together for the benefit of the boys and girls playing soccer.

SPEAKER_02 37:19

Hopefully, this is the only real messy year, you know, with the change. I mean, again, we know how that goes, but I mean I mean with how messy it is, you know, because the change is just happening. So hopeful hopefully by next year they'll have a little bit more of a handle of how things will go and our players will already be in it, right? Do you think going backwards?

SPEAKER_03 37:43

Do you think though that they're gonna make the kids always try out for age pure? Because in the past, if you were playing up, they would make you try out for your age pure group, and you could try out for the higher team.

SPEAKER_01 37:58

Yeah, I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 37:59

I I mean I'm I'm just wondering like I would I would kind well but also that would be a mess for them to do it again. We'd be basically doing this all over again next year.

SPEAKER_01 38:10

I don't know. I I think there needs to be some clearer guidelines.

SPEAKER_03 38:15

Yeah. I don't know. I guess we're gonna wait and see what happens next year. But I do agree. I hope next year it's a little bit the growing pains of this year with the age change or settled out. Maybe it's a little easier. Yeah. Maybe not. Maybe not. At least you won't have big shifts with whole teams like we have in our particular age group or one's dropping down because of the age change.

SPEAKER_02 38:41

And that's kind of what I was meaning by that.

SPEAKER_03 38:43

Yes. Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01 38:44

I knew that that's what you were talking about. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 38:47

I will say, you know, we were talking about kind of stress levels and like, I don't know, the roller coaster emotions. But also like the kids being resilient, right? I do think Xander's been a whole lot less stressed about it than I have. He's not really that stressed about it. I mean, he's not stressed about I have tryouts and I have to perform. I don't think he's worried about that much.

SPEAKER_01 39:12

Yeah. Not feeling.

SPEAKER_03 39:14

If we stop and talk about it, I'm sure he he will express his concerns and he will share those. But he's not like sitting around thinking, oh my gosh, what's gonna happen with the age change, what's gonna happen with my team. And maybe that's a little bit of naivety because he's young, right? And he's not really thinking ahead, but at least it's not consuming him and it's not stressing him out.

SPEAKER_02 39:36

But we do know that it is on some of the boys' minds. Yes. Because we interviewed a few of them and they had some opinions for us. Should we listen to them? Yeah, I like them. And talk about it? Yeah, let's do it.

SPEAKER_03 39:48

Okay. Alright, so first up we have Nico. He's one of our biggest fans. Nico Nico. Go. Alright, here I'm gonna play it for you.

SPEAKER_02 39:59

Hey Nico. Okay. So uh we want to interview you about the about try-outs. Yeah, cool. Um first question is what was the most stressful part of try-outs?

SPEAKER_05 40:14

Um, probably like the mentality, like I'm super anxious about like not making it.

SPEAKER_03 40:20

So obviously Nico's feeling a little anxious about try-outs.

SPEAKER_02 40:23

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Um what sort of your first reaction when you heard about the age change?

SPEAKER_05 40:32

I I was like a little nervous because there were some people that were better than I could just. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 40:40

Do you think adults realize how emotional the team changes could be for you guys? Um not really. Um, let's see. What do you wish coaches noticed more about during tryouts?

SPEAKER_05 40:58

I wish they notice like the mentality.

SPEAKER_02 41:01

More than skill, you think? Yeah. Yeah.

unknown 41:04

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 41:04

Okay, thank you. Oh, I loved hearing their thoughts on how tryouts went. Some of their as we keep going and listening, um, some of their thoughts are so mature for their age.

SPEAKER_03 41:20

I like how we focused on the mentality and that he was concerned not only it's yeah about his own mentality going into tryouts, but also just that other coaches see how they are feeling.

SPEAKER_01 41:34

Right. I loved hearing that because honestly, I don't know if I would have picked that response if I thought about it beforehand, but I loved hearing him say that. Yeah, I thought that was cool.

SPEAKER_03 41:45

Very mature. Alright. Next up is CJ. Let's hear what he had to say.

SPEAKER_02 41:50

How are you doing? I'm doing good. Do you c do you mind if I interview you for um tryout questions? Yeah. You mind? Do you mind? Yeah. Alright, um, let's see. What's the most stressful part about tryouts?

SPEAKER_05 42:04

Uh maybe like actually maybe nothing. Because there's nothing to worry about.

SPEAKER_02 42:12

Okay. You're you're not worried at all? No. Good. What was your first reaction to the age change?

SPEAKER_05 42:19

Uh I kind of hated it. Because it I'm pretty sure that everyone moves down or a couple people because uh of one change in one person and everyone else.

SPEAKER_02 42:34

And um, if that happened, what would you miss most about your current team?

SPEAKER_05 42:38

Uh being friends, I guess. Yeah, because I wouldn't like change. Maybe, yeah. Yeah. Because I would maybe talk less to them because they'll be with other people.

SPEAKER_02 42:51

Okay. Well, thank you for answering some questions for us.

SPEAKER_03 42:54

Uh-huh. First of all, I love that he said that he minded that we interview him. You asked him, and he's like, Yeah. And I also love that he's not worried at all.

SPEAKER_02 43:08

No, he is a very confident little boy. Yes, he is. Or I should say, young man with hostage.

SPEAKER_03 43:15

How does it make you feel hearing that, Sabrina?

SPEAKER_01 43:18

I I love his responses because he's so that's just who he is. He's very just go at the flow, happy go lucky, and I appreciate that. It's very fresh and sweet. But then hearing that he'll miss his friends, of course, I like teared up and wanted to cry. But it'll be okay. I I know it will. I know it'll be fine. But I loved his answers.

SPEAKER_03 43:44

All right, next up we have Zion, and she plays on the girls 2015 team, I believe.

SPEAKER_01 43:52

And she is Zach's little sister, and Zach is on the 2013 red team currently.

SPEAKER_03 43:57

Yes. And also Daughter to Janelle, the bread queen.

SPEAKER_01 44:02

Broke bread.

SPEAKER_02 44:03

Shout out. Hi, Bayonne. Hi. Um, so what team do you play for? Do you normally play for? This fits 2015. Okay, awesome. And so we're here at tryouts this week. And what is the most stressful part of tryouts for you?

SPEAKER_04 44:18

Probably trying to blend with all the new girls that we haven't met yet. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 44:23

What do you wish coaches noticed more during tryouts?

SPEAKER_04 44:27

Attitude, probably more than skill. Because a lot of coaches just look for like skill, but they can have like a really bad attitude or be mean to like the other players.

SPEAKER_02 44:38

I love that. That's very mature of you. Um, and last question: Do tryouts make you excited or nervous?

SPEAKER_04 44:48

Kind of a little bit of both. They make me excited to like see that we get more players and like more chances to with like people to play with. But also nervous because I want to be able to like be friends with everyone on the team and not be like almost like enemies and like not really like blending with them.

SPEAKER_01 45:07

Awesome. I absolutely love her responses. I feel like they're so mature for her age. Which I've always felt like Zion was mature for her age, and she's just very level-headed, logical thinker. Um and I just appreciate that about her.

SPEAKER_02 45:24

That's the first thing I can think of is just mature. I think if you once we listen on, you'll hear a lot of our players are wanting our coaches to see their attitude or that skill because it it plays a big part of how your team meshes together. So I love that the kids are noticing that.

SPEAKER_03 45:45

Yeah, I liked how she focused on also just how the team would work together. She said she was worried. That was what she was most nervous about for trials, was just connecting and meshing with new players in the tryout, which is something that I don't think you know, someone her age might normally pick out. That's really insightful of her. Yeah. Very all right. So next up we have Roman Heidi's boy. Hi Roman. What do you want to think about?

SPEAKER_02 46:15

Have a couple questions for you today. Okay. Okay. Uh so what was your first reaction to the age change?

SPEAKER_07 46:24

I thought it sucked. Why? Because like what's the point in age change when everyone could just like if like I feel like it should just be what when your ear when your year is, that's what's that's the year you should be trying out for.

SPEAKER_02 46:37

Yeah. And how did you feel how do you feel about possibly switching teams?

SPEAKER_07 46:43

Um I feel like I mean it's just dumb. Uh I guess it's whatever if I have to, but I mean, it's fine. Because I know some people are in 2014s, but I'd rather be on the 2013s with all my friends.

SPEAKER_02 46:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 46:57

So yeah.

SPEAKER_02 46:58

And one more question. What do you think could help make the transition easier?

SPEAKER_07 47:04

Uh I guess I think more.

SPEAKER_02 47:08

Like getting to know your new teammates. Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 47:14

It sucked. First of all, can I say he sounds like a man? I know.

SPEAKER_01 47:18

What the heck? I appreciate what Roman said because I feel like he's saying what most people want to say about the age change.

SPEAKER_03 47:27

What that it sucks?

SPEAKER_01 47:28

Like that's all he didn't care who heard that. He it was his true feelings. And I love that because I think sometimes we sugarcoat things. Right. Because we don't want to offend someone or we want to just be go with the flow or whatever. But I just appreciate it because I need people like that in my life. Yeah. You know? But that we'll just say it as it is. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 47:49

Yeah. And I also like that he pointed out just getting to know the other players, spending some time with them is a good way to help with that transition.

SPEAKER_02 47:57

Yeah, I mean, kind of like what I said earlier is like I know he doesn't want to move, but I know that if something were to happen, he he would be fine.

SPEAKER_03 48:06

Yeah, yeah. Not me though. Like whatever. I think that's what he said, right? Like whatever. All right, who do we have next? Oh, next we have Xander, my little man.

SPEAKER_02 48:18

Hey Xander, how you doing today? Good. Uh, do you mind if we ask you a couple questions for our podcast? Oh, yeah, so you're doing tryouts right now. What has been the most stressful part about it?

SPEAKER_06 48:31

Um, like make um trying to make sure that like I do good so that I can make them team.

SPEAKER_02 48:38

Okay. And um, so there's been an age uh age change this year with the teams. How do you feel about that?

SPEAKER_06 48:46

Um, I think it's kind of dumb because I don't really want to try out for the 2014 team. But like I don't the cutoff is August and it doesn't make sense because the cutoff for everything else has been like September. Like cut off for school or for other things. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 49:04

Okay, that's valid. So what do you think the hardest part about starting a new team would be?

SPEAKER_06 49:10

Like getting used to the new, like getting used to everything and like trying to like make friends. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 49:20

And last question, what do you wish kosh coaches notice more during tryouts?

SPEAKER_06 49:26

Um, I wish they would I wish they would notice like um how much like effort somebody puts in versus just how much they perform. Good answer. I like that. Alright, well, thank you for answering some questions today.

SPEAKER_01 49:44

I love that. His responses were so good. And mind you, US soccer did say September 1st the first time. Yes. And then they changed it to August 1st, which September 1st made it to where our boys, our three boys for sure, would have been able to make the cut. Well, yeah. I mean, from the age perspective, not saying that they would automatically be on the team, but they would have made the cut and then they bumped it to August. True. He is not wrong.

SPEAKER_02 50:14

He is not wrong. I loved how he said he wishes they would see the effort more than just skill, just kind of like yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:26

It's like so like mature the way you said it. He wishes they would see the effort over the performance, basically. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 50:32

Smarty pants.

SPEAKER_03 50:33

Yeah. Good point. All right, next I think we have Maverick.

SPEAKER_02 50:38

Hey Maverick, how are you doing today? Very good. How about you guys? Good, thank you. Um, do you mind if we ask you a couple questions for our podcast? Thank you. So we're doing tryouts this week. Uh, what do you think's been the most stressful part about tryouts?

SPEAKER_06 50:51

Follow us just the fact that like there's so many people. Like usually we only have about like 18, and there's just like 60 people here. It's like overwhelmingly. There has been a lot of people.

SPEAKER_02 51:00

So, what helps you feel confident at tryouts?

SPEAKER_06 51:03

Probably just like seeing other people who are good and just uh like play through. Like matching their energy.

SPEAKER_02 51:09

Kind of awesome. Let's see. So there's been an age change, right? Uh what was your first reaction to the age change?

SPEAKER_06 51:16

I honestly didn't really think about it that much because my mom said I'm like in the same area where I don't want it.

SPEAKER_02 51:21

Yeah, yeah, because it didn't personally affect anybody. So if your team changed, what would you miss most about your current team?

SPEAKER_06 51:28

All our some of our players, like there's a lot of players on our team right now that I really like. It'll be sad to see them go.

SPEAKER_02 51:33

Yeah. Do you think adults realize how emotional the team changes can be for the players? Not really. No. You think you're just like whatever. Yeah.

unknown 51:43

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 51:43

Well, thank you so much for answering questions today. I appreciate it. Yeah. Yep. Can we tell he's a coach's kid or what?

SPEAKER_03 51:51

I love his confidence. So he's like, oh yeah, cool, totally. Yeah. You can record me. Just play through. Just play through.

SPEAKER_01 51:59

He's always, I appreciate Maverick so much, whether he's just coming over to a hang or at practice or whatever. He's always smiling. And he's just polite, confidence, and he's just so sweet.

SPEAKER_03 52:11

Uh yeah, and I think he also pointed out something that I'm not sure the other kids necessarily specifically pointed out, which is that it was overwhelming with that many kids there.

SPEAKER_01 52:20

Yeah. So I wouldn't have even thought of that, honestly. But that makes a lot of sense. There is that would be overwhelmed.

SPEAKER_02 52:27

So many kids. So many kids.

SPEAKER_03 52:29

Yeah. Alright. Next up is Patty.

SPEAKER_02 52:33

Hi, Patty.

SPEAKER_03 52:35

Hi.

SPEAKER_02 52:35

Uh, do you mind if we ask you a couple questions for a podcast today? I don't mind. Okay. Thank you. So we're doing tryouts today or this week. Uh, what has been the most stressful part about it?

SPEAKER_00 52:45

Um, I mean, I haven't really been stressed out that much, but I mean, it's also always um stressful, like that you don't want to play bad in the tryouts and stuff.

SPEAKER_02 52:56

Yeah, for sure. But yeah. Um, and so what helps you feel confident at tryouts then? Um I don't know. Do you do a lot of training during the year? I mean, yeah, I do. Yeah. That's that definitely helps. Yeah.

unknown 53:10

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 53:10

And so, you know, there's been this whole age change. I know that hasn't affected you um for your personal team for you, but how do you how do you feel about it in general?

SPEAKER_00 53:21

I mean, it didn't really change anything for me. So I don't really know how it would feel to have the age thing for me.

SPEAKER_02 53:29

Yeah. So, like if your team changed, like if you didn't have the same, yeah, how would you feel?

SPEAKER_00 53:35

Yeah, that'd be pretty sad. Yeah. Like how to start all over.

SPEAKER_02 53:38

Right. And last question: what do you wish coaches noticed more during tryouts?

SPEAKER_00 53:46

Like decision making, like when they pass the ball and when they drill the ball and stuff.

SPEAKER_02 53:51

Okay. Alright. Well, thank you for answering some questions today.

SPEAKER_03 53:54

No problem.

SPEAKER_02 53:55

What was it that he said?

SPEAKER_03 53:57

He so he said decision making. Can I just say like how gosh, yeah. How much that says about like his whole soccer IQ, right? Yeah. And of course he's not worried. He's so humble. Yeah. Patty's such an exceptional player.

SPEAKER_02 54:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 54:12

I feel like his voice is changing too.

SPEAKER_01 54:13

Oh, I know. I loved hearing the confidence, but yeah, like you said, humble. He is such a humble friend, humble soccer player. Like he is just a well-rounded young man. And I loved hearing that. He's like, Well, I would be sad, you know, and a little bit of emotion in there.

SPEAKER_09 54:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 54:33

If it had affected him, but I I do have to notice too, he said it would change things, and you have to get used to a new team or something. But in all reality, everyone's gonna be getting used to new players. Yeah. You know, so maybe thinking about it, he's not thinking at that level. Yeah, you know what I mean? But I loved hearing his response.

SPEAKER_02 54:52

Yeah, I absolutely adore Patty. Yeah. Um like Monica said, his soccer IQ is crazy. And I love all of our boys really look up to him. I feel like um, yes, absolutely. He has a lot to teach to teach our boys.

SPEAKER_01 55:10

So he's a good friend too.

SPEAKER_02 55:13

Yeah. Well, ladies, it's been a great night again. Um, I enjoyed our conversation.

SPEAKER_03 55:19

I enjoyed listening to the boys and getting their input. We're gonna have to get them on this podcast soon. And Zion. Oh yeah, Zion. I'm sorry, Zion, if you're listening.

SPEAKER_02 55:29

We love you. So, no matter what side of the conversation we're on, right? The one thing that is true is that our kids are not just a roster spot, a birth year, or some tryout number. We just want them to love the game and want them to feel our love and support while they grow through it.

SPEAKER_03 55:48

Amen. I totally agree. And you know what, ladies, no matter what happens, we are going to come out the other side of this. These boys are hopefully gonna be on teams that are well suited to them.

SPEAKER_08 56:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 56:01

And no matter what, we're keeping this podcast going, right? Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 56:06

Well, we'll be back again next Tuesday, but until then, we'll see you. See you on the sidelines.